Created at Nakanoshima Museum of Art in Osaka, Japan. Bottled myself with too many Japanese who are immensely rooted with their reserved culture. Each of the encounter seems to start with fearing of offending others, rather than being open and receptive to each other. Politeness or overly protective self boundaries?
You have to leave paintings for 12 months and then look at them again.
There are two things which you can record: you can record a very factual thing like a portrait of yourself, and you can also record your sensations about a lot of various things but you have to, in the portraits you have already your image there, which you want to find a way by which this thing can record it. And this is a very complex thing.
Soundtrack: “Le Cygne (Camille Saint-Saën)” by Stephanie Dupras, Roxanne Castonguay
Standing in the middle of obsession
Fighting against passionate accumulationand repetition inside
Lost in an indescribable spell that is holding me
Rapsody said “the pressure made a Ruby.” Who isn’t going through something? May you live blissfully and be yourself wholly. How others think about you is none of your business.
There hasn't been much space in my life for playfulness and distraction. But we only have one life. We need to express with our actions not only by words. It’s a reminder from Hello Kitty having no mouth.
Soundtrack: Clay Pigeons by Michael Cera
- Choosing, buying, moving canvas back, imaginating, creating a king size bed painting, refilling colours, filming, editing video, adding subtitles to translate 1 of my favourite songs into Chinese, all made by myself with grace and faith. Did the best I can. I will do better when I know better.
How much I wish my soul creating yet not possessing the work only by me. But I have faith inside my heart that no one could take away. No matter what we do, how much we earn, we need another human being for survival in times of hardships. Love is the driving force to keep going.
- May you be free, eternally.
I am not in the centre of anything. I am just, like, such a pleb. No one probably takes me seriously and everyone slightly feels sorry for me. I am doing really big, figurative paintings that seem so much more me. If I am sharing the blissfulness with someone, they’ve got to be a pretty big person with quite an amazing imagination. You climb the ladder for the entry, I don’t make stairs for you. My job is to be myself at any cost.
- Keep fighting the unspeakable battles.
I’ve walked through 4 seasons, realizing sweetness in life all comes from my mind, mind is our most powerful organ.
- My work explores the notion of the soul in limbo, the liminal state between reality and idealism, perpetually on the cusp of transcendence.
What my word says is irrelevant. People who comprehend the language cannot read it anymore due to my intensity of writing.
Somehow the word loses its meaning, which creates another meaning, which is my form, my activity.
Soundtrack: Words of Love by Arthur Russel (Arthur Russel is a genius never to be recognised in his own times but to be enjoyed by generations to come. Thanks music as always for offering me comfort.)
To live a good life is to learn to trust herself and her instincts, and begins to rely more comfortably on her decision-making capabilities. With no need to repress any part of herself, she has a greater ability to tune in to all the parts of herself.
Let your dreams be bigger than your current capacity to achieve them. God proves to us He is trustworthy. In His good timing, all things will be made beautiful because of His name Jesus. Do not let fear cheat us out of our dream, God is bigger than whatever you’re worried about.
We seek companionship in relationships on social network but we face fear committing a conversation in real life. Because conversations include not just great time but also embarrassing
moments, lots of emotions, hesitation between words etc. We reveal more of ourselves to each other. We become more vulnerable when talking to another person in real life than texting in digital world.
I am terrified of life where we’re constantly connected but forget to love. But I remain hopeful. More active listening, connect deeper, telling people they matter.
She is contradictory, she is many-faceted, that one can say there were many sides in one soul. Everyday she has to start in a way. She is an artist, like true, but like- is she though? She has created. But what she has was due only to the past. She can’t be effected, at least not egotistically. In any way she is so far from it now. She’s left it behind. Or rather, she left her. All artworks are rafts sent downstream while their creator stands on the shore, empty handed.
“Silence is not a sound but it is the most powerful sound.” - Thich Nhat Hahn
Silence’s full of answers. May you hear the poetry, heart and soul of things. Find yourself, good luck. To whoever wants to rush something, let time take its time. You have an incredibly fun and radiant future ahead of you, and you‘re amazing to have experienced it all. You’ll always be happy in the days to come.
No Shame
You don’t have to fit the mold, there’s magic in breaking free. You don’t have to dim your light for anyone, it’s your right to shine in any form you wish to. My imaginative thoughts of a Japanese mythology of Yamasachihiko and Umisachihiko (山幸彦と海幸彦) are written in this drawing.
How to view?
This drawing comprises of six papers, which can be seen in multiple ways
depending on how they are placed. By placing the men upside down, I use a sacastic way
to intentially throw away people I no longer love by means of gravity- getting them out of
my head; while mother, who has been taking care of me since my first day of leg injury, is
placed near my left thigh. The person wearing medical compression corset is my suffering
self expression when I was powerless to walk at ease. The person with a pair of glasses
refers to my own self, I intend to make fun of myself how silly to allow other human beings
to walk past my healthy boundaries with the universe.
What is the meaning behind the written texts in the background?
The coming of a person is, in fact, a tremendous feat. Because he comes with his past and
present and with his future. Because a person’s whole life comes with him. Since it is so
easily broken the heart that comes along would have been broken ― a heart whose layers
the wind will likely be able to trace, if my heart could mimic that wind it can become a
hospitable place. Knowing myself is not easy already. Knowing others is almost impossible.
But the fact that humans are able to come together and communicate and coexist is truly
astonishing. Everyone comes with their own ‘baggage’ — their own past, their own present,
their own future. It’s not something to downplay or ignore. When a person comes, that
person’s entire life comes with him. It's fragile, so it may already be broken, that heart that’s
come. To accept myself as a person is to accept all of my weight; that, perhaps, is the best
comfort that one human being can offer to oneself and to other people.
When and Why?
I created this in July 2 years ago. I was too anxious that even a well-
known artist friend of mine told me not to judge my own art, just
let others feel it, I still gave a damn on others' minds. People who
truly understand me always advised me not to be too hard on
myself, and yet I wasn't prepared for looking at myself in a way
that my beloved others see me. After my visit to Depot Boijmans
realizing that things deteriorate real quick... so before this largest
artwork of mine dries out/ is gradually affected by humidity, I
wanna give myself the greatest thing, i.e. freedom from what
others think. I share this to express.
What?
Emotions need not be all breakdown. It may also be breakthrough.
By tuning in to my facial expressions that are linked to 7 basic
emotions - contempt, fear, happiness, surprise, disgust, sadness -
their ubiquity allows myself a deeper, richer experience in every
part of my life. I used to think I can selectively block emotion, and
dampen down disturbing or uncomfortable feelings, but when I
repress some of my emotions, I inevitably turn down the volume
of all my emotions, denying myself access to the whole of my
nature.
How?
Your new life will cost your old you. Therefore, to love myself openly
and unconditionally, I UNLEARN my past experience with
remembrance, and LEARN to trust my future with longing. By always
remaining open to everything that occurs, rather than labelling my
arising emotions as “good” or “bad”, I accept all parts of myself. With
this knowledge, I now choose to release all barriers to love and
embrace myself with colours - as reflected in this largest artwork of
mine. Happy face is great, but we also need to accept our “negative”
feelings instead of avoiding or repressing them. Rainbow comprises
of 7 colours; we should also accept all forms of experiences that
keep our mental and physical senses in a state of balance and ease.
What would you say to the one you have loved?
“If one day you can forget the past, remember to come to me.”
“If there are more tickets, will you come with me?”
If you can't find your soulmate, the communication is just a
one-way murmur. May hatred no longer consumes space in
your mind. Only abundant joy and ease.
The quirky things that make me different are what make me beautiful.
Embracing my difference is about accepting myself for all that I am, including my flaws and illnesses. In all flaws and fumbles there is true beauty.
Look for them and celebrate every step forward. Don’t just try to be ordinary.
You’re not ordinary at all.
Humans especially empathic people use mirroring to understand their place in the world. I did this my whole childhood and still notice myself getting pulled into it at times. This can look like taking on others’ judgements as your own and not checking in with your own authentic feelings. Our subconscious tend to look for matches to ideas or beliefs we already have, often ones that are
meant to keep us small, stuck or safe. Received millions of different advices from people and I do what I want. It only has to make sense to me.
Life is just like a trip with a lot of good and bad things.
Sometimes, we get lost. We can be caught in a shower all of a sudden. We never know when and how every precious moment changes. Don’t be sorry and enjoy the ride.
“The only people for me are the mad ones, the ones who are mad to live, mad to talk, mad to be saved, desirous of everything at the same time, the ones who never yawn or say a commonplace
thing, but burn, burn, burn, like fabulous yellow roman candles...” - Jack Kerouac
They say you cannot show the world what you feel. Tell people how you feel, don’t worry about being too much. Be too much.
Care too much. Let the right people show up for you. Let th remind you there’s kindness in this world. Be vulnerable. Find beauty in each breakdown. Connect with those who make you feel deeply, who creates moments that bring tears to your eyes. Connect with every ounce of who you are.