We all suffer unfairly, or experience loss. We may come to feel that there must be something inherently wrong with us, or someone did something to bring the situation upon us. The important step in forming the meaning of our pain is understanding that it’s not about deserving.

Pain is not a zero-sum game. If somebody hurts us, hurting them back doesn’t make it better. Nobody deserves trauma.While our problems may not always be our faults, we’re the only ones in charge of self-care. And the only thing we can control is the meaning we ascribe to our pain. 

Bravely accept, change or let go.